Perhaps you and your partner have been struggling to repair your relationship after infidelity. Neither of you wants to say goodbye to each other, despite all of the challenges you’ve faced. But you don’t know how to move forward. You might be dealing with feelings of betrayal and mistrust. In the wake of infidelity, you may even be experiencing symptoms of anxiety or depression. You want to trust in your partner again, or maybe you want to earn back their trust in you. Yet you don’t know how to achieve this.
Recovering from infidelity is not easy, and it’s not a process that you can move through overnight. Here are a few tips to help you rebuild your relationship after infidelity in the long run.
Take Your Time
First, it’s important not to rush the process. Be honest with yourself about where you both stand right now, and allow yourself to simply feel whatever you’re feeling. Don’t try to suppress complicated emotions, or convince yourself that you’re ready to move forward when you’re not. Instead, evaluate your emotional state at the moment. Be ready to express to your partner how you feel in an honest way.
Commitment From Both Partners
In order to truly recover from infidelity, both partners have to be completely on board. If you’re still questioning whether or not you really want to repair this relationship, it may be time to take a step back. Furthermore, if you suspect that your partner is not fully in, talk to them before you both decide to make a commitment. You need to both be fully committed to fixing this relationship.
Infidelity ruins the trust between two partners. If you hope to rebuild your relationship on a solid foundation, cultivating a sense of trust between the two of you is your first step. Talk about the ways in which you felt that trust was missing from your relationship. Then, try addressing each area with a proposed solution. For instance, do you feel like you need to get to know your partner’s friends better so that you feel comfortable with the people they hang out with? Do you want your partner to check in with you more often about their plans? These are just a few examples of changes you can make to repair your trust.
Communication is the secret to any healthy relationship. It sounds so simple on paper, but in practice, communicating openly can be hard! A lack of open communication is often a contributing factor in infidelity. Both partners need to be on the same page when it comes to communication. Talk to your partner about your thoughts and feelings about the future of your relationship. Tell them what you need within a relationship, and what needs to change in order for you to trust in them again. Give them the chance to share the same thoughts with you.
Work With a Therapist
Sometimes, you and your partner might feel like you’re stumbling through the dark as you try to recover from infidelity. You may wonder what you’re supposed to do next, or how you can ever truly trust each other again after what happened. Working with a therapist can help you find the guidance you need. Your therapist can help you set new ground rules for your relationship and discuss appropriate boundaries. They can also support you as you reflect on what happened and how to move forward.
Are you and your partner trying to reconcile after infidelity? Talking to a couples therapist can help. Reach out to us today to discuss your options for scheduling your first session.
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